For immediate release
Adam Levine Overdoses On Love
New charity-driven apparel line pushes Maroon 5 singer into irreversible euphoric state.
SAN DIEGO, CA, Month/Day/2014 — Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine was found skipping shirtless through the streets of Hollywood early yesterday, shouting “I’m in love with love!” and trailing what seemed to be lotus flowers. Authorities detained him for a medical and psychological evaluation, where experts concluded that Levine had overdosed on love. Friends confirmed that Levine had been shopping online for unique yoga wear earlier in the day when he discovered Kevala, a new sustainable fitness apparel line that donates a portion of each purchase to charity. After watching this video (http://tinyurl.com/n6zalgu) in particular, Levine was apparently so overcome with love and inspiration that he kicked down his front door and took off running.
“It was scary how fast he got totally blissed out. I mean, the mirror-image affirmations printed on the t-shirts were really cool. But when Adam realized he could get an awesome shirt and help support one of Kevala’s 50+ charity partners? Whoa,” said Levine’s gardener, Toby Jensen. Levine has no prior history of love-abuse, but the positive energy surrounding the Kevala concept proved to be too much of a temptation.
When reached for comment, Kevala founder Keith Donohue said, “I can’t say I’m surprised. Our signature t-shirt literally radiates inspiration. That’s powerful stuff.” Doctors are not sure when or even if Levine will fully recover from the overdose, but they’re hopeful he’ll someday learn to manage any lingering effects. “Best case scenario: he’ll be able to channel the love toward other worthy causes instead of supermodels,” said Dr. Ronald Hines, Chief of Loveology at Hollywood’s Presbyterian Medical Center. Donohue expressed regrets that Kevala might be too awesome for some people to handle, but feels confident that Levine will come out of this for the better. “He’s got an open invite to our launch party on June 8th!” said Donohue.
Kevala was founded on three main principles: creating something with unique functionality, giving back to the community, and making sure all products are made with sustainable materials. The idea for the active wear line and donation-with-purchase component evolved from one of Donohue’s other charitable adventures, 50Give, where he spent nearly 5 months traveling to all 50 states (plus Canada, the District of Columbia and Mexico) to volunteer at different non-profit organizations. All of these crazy, love-filled ideas fall under Donohue’s parent organization,Positive Present.
For more information about Kevala’s upcoming launch, please contact Keith Donohue firstname.lastname@example.org.